Sh*t People Say to People with Mental Illness 

“We all get the blues!” 

You: Um, so… I can’t function on a daily basis. I’m on the floor right now, unable to move. I’ve been sobbing for so long that I can’t breathe. This is my everyday. This is NOT “the blues.” 

“Just be strong and put on a smile.” 

You: Obviously I’ve tried that. I’ve gone to the Olive Garden and eaten breadsticks and spaghetti like a champ, talked about the weather, and smiled my best smile (while simultaneously losing it inside) 30 mins at table smiling, 4 mins in bathroom crying, back to table smiling for another 15. “Check please.” I’m trying so hard. Thanks for making me feel worse about myself and like I’m weak. I’m already ashamed. 

“My cousin cured her depression by eliminating gluten.”

You: Ya, so you’re making me feel worse. *cries and eats almond flower cookie* 

“This will be your new doctor- he’s a 25-year-old resident!” (Nurse voice) 

You: Ok, thanks. 

“Hi- I’m James! I love working with bipolar people.” (Resident voice)  

You: Um. It’s “people with bipolar..” You know- person first? 

“What? So, you’re taking an SNRI?” (Resident voice) 

You: This is an SSRI. 

“Oh. Opps! My bad.” (Resident voice) 

You: Yay! I feel like I’m in such good hands :/ 

“Have you tried yoga and nutrition?”

You: Yes. I’m in chronic, debilitating emotional pain that tortures me. Of course I’ve tried everything on the planet. 

“But have you REALLY tried daily cardio, hypnotherapy, acupuncture, amino acids, fish oil, herbs…” 

You: Yes. *walks away and cries more* 

“But you don’t look like a person with mental illness…” 

You: Thanks for letting me know you are stigmatizing us. Right on. 

“Don’t go crazy and kill me or anything!” 

You: You’re ignorance about what mental illness is = appalling. This is why we hide. 

“I’m sorry- that won’t be covered by your insurance.” (Unkind insurance company person voice) 

You: *worries more, cries* Looks at bills.. *cries more*

“I need your social!” (Annoyed secretary voice) 

You: Ok- here it is. 

“I need your insurance info!” (Annoyed secretary voice) 

You: Let me find it *voice breaks, crying* 

“We don’t have any appointments open for three months.” 

You: *heart sinks into stomach* 

“I don’t take any insurance. It’s self pay.” (Snobby psychiatrist voice) 

You: Ok, you only help rich people.. Cool. 

“You shouldn’t take medication. Those are so unnatural.” 

You: Remember when you went to the doctor last year for the broken leg and got a cast? You should have poured herbs on your leg. Extra oregano. It was weak for you to get the treatment for your leg. 

 “The insurance companies are evil and put everyone on mind numbing drugs!” 

You: I don’t feel numb. I feel OK for once- like I can get out of bed and make eggs. 

“These medications are overprescribed! Sadness teaches us important life lessons and people miss these with medication!” 

You: They might be overprescribed but this doesn’t mean the people who need them should not be prescribed them. If doctors gave everyone insulin would you say no one should have it- even the people with diabetes? We aren’t talking “dark night of the soul” here. We are talking unable to leave the house. We are talking people killing themselves. 

“Have you read The Secret?” (Bubbly certified life coach) You attracted your depression! 

You: Oh weird… I thought it was my genes. So I’m responsible for my illness.. Silly me!

“You have to think positive!” 

You: I try so hard. I say a positive thought and immediately my mind snaps back with a negative one, 100 times as loud, like a reflex that I can’t control. It’s constant shouting that I can’t quiet. Of course I try everything to control it. My brain eats my happy thoughts like Cookie Monster eats cookies. 

“Let’s talk about something else like.. A sale at The Gap!” (Weirded out “friend” voice)

You: Thanks for changing the subject so I feel even more shame and am more likely not to be open about what I’m going through. “Omg! What’s on sale!?” *heart breaks, embarrassed* 

“Mental ill depressed person kills 7 people with a rusty chain saw!!!!” (Intense news anchor voice) 

You: Thanks for perpetuating the stigma and making us out to be monsters! People with mental illness are more likely to be victims of crimes then commit them- and are not more violent then the general population. 

“Have you tried vitamins?” 

You: *runs for the hills”

“My uncle’s cousin’s brother was like… Schizophrenic.. ? And like.. He killed a cat… I think.. ? So this is really important to me..? Because.. I love animals?” (Very confused volunteer voice)

You: Everything you say sounds like a question? 

These are mine so far! What are crappy things people say to you? 
Let’s break the stigma together! Yay! 

*ps fortunately I have found the right medication and live a happy, fulfilling life. I pray that you do, too. It IS possible and things get better! I still can’t stand when people say things like this and it makes me super sad. I’m starting to just stand up for myself or walk away if someone can’t understand. I deserve to have my voice heard. We deserve to challenge and change the stigmatization of mental illness! 

* I don’t give medical/psychological advice because I’m not qualified- I’m a writer! 😀 Please get help if you are struggling! You deserve to be at peace! 

* If you break your leg go to the doctor. No oregano treatments, k? 

So much love! Rachie 

153 thoughts on “Sh*t People Say to People with Mental Illness 

  1. Love this! So accurate. The part about pouring herbs on your leg haha!
    This is one I used to get constantly when I was having a bad depressive episode:
    “I’ll make you a cup of tea”
    Me: Unless you are putting Serotonin in there no amount of tea will make me feel better!

    Liked by 4 people

  2. I’ve heard every asinine statement in this post. Just thinking about them makes me want to go to Kaiser and punch someone…which of course I won’t — but by God if ever there were people who deserved to get clocked they are the idiots that have ruined the mental health system in the U.S.

    and BTW:

    I’ve nominated you for the Blogger Recognition Award.

    Details here: http://wp.me/p47Ymh-28s

    There is no obligation to accept.

    Thanks. 🙂

    Liked by 3 people

    1. 😦 yes- people act like its a choice or character flaws when they would NEVER say that about other illnesses. Very scary since eating disorders need to be taken extremely seriously. So sorry you’ve had these experiences.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Here’s one: “You are the last one I ever thought would have depression…you seem so positive all the time.” Smiles can mask a lot of pain. Don’t assume.

    I’m especially sensitive to the constant news reporting that claims the shooter was, of course, bipolar. sigh…

    It’s sad that so many have these experiences. Thanks for sharing. Van

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Definitely! I also am a very positive person and was voted miss congeniality in the high school yearbook- appearances aren’t always what they seem- you are right! The news is awful with perpetuating the stigma- I also cringe when they announce the person was mentally ill- ugh!

      Liked by 2 people

    1. Exactly…and notice that statements like that aren’t made about any other illness. Imagine how pissed off my friend with cancer would be if I told her that her chemotherapy was “like that time I had the flu”!

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Very sharp blog ☺ Would say, though that CBTwas very good for me re getting some tools for learning to think positively when not down and the habit makes the depression less of an issue because of the hard worked on to develop habit of facing negative thoughts head on and consciously asking ‘is that a reasonable thought under these circumstances?’ that can do the crucial work of interrupting the flow of negative thoughts often enough to help a lot. Megative thoights become the default setting and they win the day if unchallenged. Doesnt work for all but the ingrained negatives thoughts, beliefs and assumptions of depression CAN and MUST be challenged on good days to lessen the severity of the bad ones. And B vitamin supplements are not magic but they do sharpen the brain for me. People mean well and some of the things they say can help. Trouble is, hearing them said when already feeling dowm makes them seem vaccuous and patronising. Getting proactive and focusing on what is good about us and our lives is work to be done on the good days to make them better to head off the downs at the pass as much as possible, not the magic solution well meaning people think they are offering to a person ready feeling down.

    In short things like thinking positive work well a lot of the time, if they are embraced as a life habit, and stuck with even when they feel pointless and not espoused as band aids for the bad days. If even that sounds patronising I can only say nothing ever worked for me until I let myself hope something MIGHT and kept hoping until I found I was able to let myself believe something could. Once you believe feeling bad is not inevitable you can feel better about the possibility of feeling better.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I agree 100%. CBT is great- I love the book “feeling good” by David Burns. Have you heard of Byron Katie? Her book “loving what is” and her system which you can google called “the work” helped me immensely. What you do is when you have a stressful thought you ask:
      Is it true?
      Can I absolutely know that it’s true?
      How do I react when I believe that thought?
      Who would I be without the thought
      Then you find three reasons why the opposite thought is true. You can see her facilitate it w people on YouTube. So glad you worked hard and found stuff that works. I also agree that sometimes suggestions help, especially from someone with experience w mental illness or a professional who really cares and is intuitive and smart. This was also sort of making fun of stuff and laughing which is another therapeutic thing- oh the book Brain Lock also helped me! Great thoughts and great to connect!!!

      Liked by 1 person

  5. I hate “Just smile! Even if you don’t feel like it because it releases endorphins!” I just want to say “smiling when I feel like this makes me want to punch you in the face and jump off a building!”

    Liked by 1 person

      1. I know!!!!!! Like it’s some great new revelation you’ve never had! Lol !!! It’s awful because you’re heart is aching and then they are like “you’re choosing this!” We really need to educate people! Maybe we could make commercials!!! Lol!

        Liked by 1 person

  6. Love this!

    Are you sure about the whole oregano thing? I’m guessing it would work wonders. 😛

    I’ve always hated when someone would tell me, ‘you have nothing to be depressed about. Suck it up. Other people have it worse.’ It was the trifecta of terrible. I’d feel so much guilt, helplessness because I couldn’t ‘suck it up’ no matter how hard I tried and then more guilt. Ugh. I’ve found a perfect medication for me and I can say it saved my life. I love my anti-depressant.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Bahahaha you made me chuckle !!!
      How funny is it that I put an oregano medical warning- I think my anxiety was like “oh no! What if someone tries it” bahahaha
      Ugh! Ya because our depression isn’t situational – everything can be perfect and our brains see it through depression goggles! So it can have nothing to do with the circumstances- In the past I felt so lucky and blessed and fortunate but my brain was sending me only messages of sadness and anxiety. And yes as you said- more guilt for not being able to suck it up- So so so glad you found the right medication and are rocking! I did too and have been happy and free for like 7 years. I’ll be on it for life! It’s possible to move forward! Yay! Muah!!!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Hahaha, I loved the medical disclaimer.

        It’s amazing to me, though, how much stigma is attached to mental illness. My sister suffers from depression and recently said she was finally going to seek some help. I told her the medication I take so she knows what has worked for me, which would hopefully save her the pain of trying multiple medications. Her response was that she wasn’t okay with a doctor ‘messing with’ the chemicals in her brain.

        Why the hell not? Like you said about insulin, would you refuse it because it messes with your insulin levels? No, because it’s an ILLNESS.

        We’ve gotta get rid of the stigma so people can get the help they need.

        Your blog is such a great way to de-stigmatize mental illness. Keep up the good work!

        Like

      2. That was so my anxiety doing the oregano disclaimer !! Lol
        Oh man- that was such a good idea, too, because I’ve heard that when a medication works for one family member is often works for another-
        And ugh one of the worst times in my life was the trying of medications to see which worked- if you can save her from that!!!!
        I can get sad because I feel like their is sooooo much stigma/ but then I feel encouraged to meet people like you- we are all doing our part! Muah!

        Liked by 1 person

      3. It took me 5 meds to find one that works. The experiences with different ones was miserable, oh man. I hope she takes me advice and looks as it like treating an illness rather than a weakness.

        Liked by 1 person

      4. Yes! I also went off and on many times becauseI felt bad for taking it! Wish someone had been like, earlier, “dude- this is like insulin for diabetes” finally after years someone did – hope your sister knows it’s not a character flaw or weakness! Yes.

        Liked by 1 person

  7. This post is so true, on so may different levels. The biggest thing I could hearing is if I fix my diet, my anxiety will magically go away. Been there, done that. I’ll keep taking my drugs thanks.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I knoooooow! I’ve tried every diet known to man back when I felt shame for taking medicine! Taking medicine for life isn’t ideal for anyone – and there can be side effects etc so of course we’d rather some miracle cure!!! But that it just not the case. I totally agree!

      Liked by 1 person

  8. It’s not easy. It will likely never be easy. With hard work, we can persevere. We cannot forget where we came from and how dark those blinders once were. I think of my experiences often and they push me to work harder. The harder I work, the better I feel. Hard work is NOT “just getting over it”. If they were only in our shoes…or, until they experience something similar…

    I love your blog. You are open, honest, and forthright. Hugs!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Awesome thoughts.. Thanks SO much! I have no doubt that my illness pushed me to do more than I ever would without it. It has propelled me to go further and be even more at peace with my mind then I think I would be without having gone through so much. I believe all the pain I felt when the blinders were on, as you said (love that) is energy I carry with me that I can do great things in the world with (I’m cheesy and spiritual lol) I believe the quotes about going so deep in the darkness and now being able to go further into the light. I’m so glad you are working so hard and getting through! So glad to connect with you!

      Liked by 1 person

  9. The worst thing I hear is ‘Get Over it’ or ‘People Need To Get Over Their Problems’ what my dad says. I have an idea for a topic post being the environment you grow up in and how it affects you. I have been surrounded by negativity my whole life and it causes me to think negatively a lot. I read into things a lot and assume people are saying something to give me a hard time when it’s not true. I think a post on putting yourself in a good environment for your mental health would be good. If you want to take a look at my Cinderella story it’s on my wordpress as the most recent blog ‘Princess Christina Nogueira’ i think you would enjoy it.

    Liked by 2 people

  10. Oh I love love this! There is nothing worse when you are in a depressive episode than for someone (usually not a medical professional) to just smile and snap out of it. Or ‘think happy thoughts’, ‘Be positive’, it makes me so angry that I want to punch them.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. I want to like this twice. You are very quotable. I can relate to the joy of being able to get out of bed and make eggs. There have been many times when that was a huge accomplishment. ” eating happy thoughts like Cookie Monster eats cookies”. Lol. Thank you for this. I see it over and over, sometimes our sense of humor, of irony, of the sardonic is what keeps us going.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes! Exactly!! Laughter brings a lightness to something so, so heavy – I found myself making jokes even in the worst of times with it. I’m writing a whole musical about mental illness- at first I was like “Is it appropriate to joke about this?” But then I was like – I have this as a personal experience- I’m laughing with everyone – and anything that gets people talking is good- no more hiding in the shadows with a shame blanket. (The musical is serious as well but has jokes through it) It’s hard to get through a post without mentioning Cookie Monster, right? Or at least one of the muppets! I’m obsessed! Lol!
      Thanks for your super kind response. I’m sorry you relate to the eggs line- because I know how awful that is- I remember getting the mail once and being like “whoo! I got the mail.” Hey- it’s ok to celebrate little things a long the way. Sometimes I write things I’ve already done on my to-do list and cross them off like “ya I’m awesome” even though I already did them! Haha anyway great to meet u!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Lol. Exactly. Cookie Monster rules! I once grow a beard because I couldn’t bring my shelf to shave. When I finally did it felt like I’d climbed a mountain. I saw that you are working on a musical. Hope I get to see it if it gets uploaded to Youtube, that would be awesome.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Oh yay! Well, I’ll definitely be uploading more and more videos about the musical and hopefully one day the whole thing! I’ll definitely keep you posted!!! I’m going to post a song from it to with a blog about what it is about! Talk soon! Love your comments! Cheering for you!

        Liked by 1 person

  12. Here’s another one…
    I’m not sure how religious you are, but I’ve been told to pray about it and that I can be healed if I *really* wanted to be. Oh yeah, like I *want* to feel like crap! Apparently I’m only in this position because I don’t have enough faith, believe a certain way and/or have some unresolved sin in my life. I’m sure I do, but I don’t think God is using bipolar, etc as a “punishment”. I’ve definitely prayed, but I believe God allows things to happen for a reason so maybe some good can come of it.

    Oh, and there’s always the one about just acting “that way” to get attention. As though we couldn’t find a more interesting way to stand out. Riiiiiiiiight.

    Like

    1. Oh no! How awful! I once was told those things, too- and then a minister I talked to was like, “I think God created these great medications for people who suffer.. Or the great minds to create these advances” I think it’s cruel to say that people get sick and don’t heal because they don’t have enough faith- absurd! That’s acting like your God to say that and making God simple. I prayed so hard about my depression and anxiety and came to realize Gods answer can be medical treatment! Attention thing is so lame, too. We often don’t want the attention because of the stigma and shame- and like you said, could find much better ways. These responses are making me want to speak up more and more- I used to just smile and nod when people said this crap- now I’m going to be like “actually…” Lol !!!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I’ve tried to tell some people that re: God using doctors and medical treatment to heal someone, but they insist I’m wrong. They insist I’m not seeing something, don’t want to admit something, relying more on things of the world than on God, etc but I see doctors and some things of this world as God’s tools-who made this planet and everything on it (including the stuff used to make meds)? Who gave the doctors, etc their talent? You get the drift. It’s really weird because that doesn’t happen about any other type of illness.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. I know. They see it as a willpower thing, which is IS NOT. It’s an illness that needs treatment. It’s just like a broken leg. They think they understand because they’ve had a bad day or a anxious moment, but as a YouTube video I like said something like “comparing a person w out mental illness having a depressed mood to clinical depression is like comparing a paper cut to a horrible wound” it’s like comparing a bruise to broken leg- you can let a bruise heal but a broken leg you need medical treatment. It’s so hard to educate people- I agree. It can be so disheartening and sometimes makes me so angry! It’s so hurtful.. My heart is with you. I only tell supportive people that I take medication. Some battles aren’t worth it. If I can’t educate them and they are being hurtful, sometimes I need to walk away. I hope it gets better! So much love your way!

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      3. It also reminds me of this story I’ve heard a few times: A man was trapped in his house during a flood. He began praying to God to rescue him. He had a vision in his head of God’s hand reaching down from heaven and lifting him to safety. The water started to rise in his house. His neighbour urged him to leave and offered him a ride to safety. The man yelled back, “I am waiting for God to save me.” The neighbour drove off in his pick-up truck.

        Flood
        The man continued to pray and hold on to his vision. As the water began rising in his house, he had to climb up to the roof. A boat came by with some people heading for safe ground. They yelled at the man to grab a rope they were ready to throw and take him to safety. He told them that he was waiting for God to save him. They shook their heads and moved on.

        The man continued to pray, believing with all his heart that he would be saved by God. The flood waters continued to rise. A helicopter flew by and a voice came over a loudspeaker offering to lower a ladder and take him off the roof. The man waved the helicopter away, shouting back that he was waiting for God to save him. The helicopter left. The flooding water came over the roof and caught him up and swept him away. He drowned.

        When he reached heaven and asked, “God, why did you not save me? I believed in you with all my heart. Why did you let me drown?” God replied, “I sent you a pick-up truck, a boat and a helicopter and you refused all of them. What else could I possibly do for you?”

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    2. I totally can relate. “You should pray more” they said. ( I was praying more than I ever had, perhaps). “You need to get your eyes off the problems and onto Jesus” (true, but sometimes you can’t do that until you have medical help!!! If you have averaged 3 hours of broken sleep daily for 4 months, chances are you aren’t going to be focussing on anything except staying alive! Read my Post natal Depression Story (part 1 and 2) and be encouraged that things did get better, but at the same time, it had to happen gradually. I am going to hopefully put the audio from a talk I did at MOPS (Mothers of Pre-schoolers) and the doctor talk before it on dropbox and share it because even 2 years after I wrote the Post natal depression story to share at playgroup, I have improved heaps. As a Christian, I often find that there are some especially difficult people in the church who oversimplify everything, and it is simply not their place. God is a God of compassion – “Praise be to the Lord, to God our Savior, who daily bears our burdens.” (Psalm 68:19) and he cares “Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you” (1 Peter 5:7).

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Girl. You are amazing. I will def read that post of yours! I’m a liberal Christian but as one minister I met with said, “God made medicine possible- put those abilities in people who were able to create this medicine” We don’t tell people with diabetes or a broken leg to just pray and quote scriptures about healing to them- when someone is suffering from a mental illness I think the least compassionate thing and most judgmental thing) in other words, not Christian values) would be telling someone not to get help or that it’s the devil or demons possessing them. That will just make someone feel responsible and spiritually weak. I’ll have to share a song w you I wrote about asking for God’s answers when I was really struggling – I felt like my answer has been taking medication and having a strong community, friendships, relationships and working hard to keep my mind on the positive. I wouldn’t be able to help others and serve others if I wasn’t medically treated— so sorry you’ve had to deal with all that! We can’t cast our anxieties on God unless we are able to function enough to do so! Or we can as we are getting treatment. 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Thank-you for the encouragement and for sharing from your heart . I would love to hear the song or read the lyrics. Is it on your blog or do you have dropbox/ SoundCloud?

        Liked by 1 person

  13. I love “But you were doing so good the other day “(maybe faked it better).
    “Why are you doing this to us again?” ( Yes I choose to be depressed and have debilitating anxiety).
    I’ve heard yoga,nutrition,prayer,keeping busy,all of the same things. Yes sometimes these do work but then there is times NOTHING works except getting through it. I love how people think it’s like a cold and it will just go away. It’s a brain DISEASE people! Thank you for your post. Good to know I’m not the only one dealing w this.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Aw I’m sorry you are going through that- maybe share some educational resources about how mental illness is not something you are doing- it’s not a choice- you’d never choose it !

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  14. Another one I hear is, “If you just smile enough, you’ll soon feel happy on the inside! Sometimes you have to fake it to make it!”
    And I’m like: It’s impossible for me to smile when there isn’t anything for me to be happy about. You don’t understand.
    Or I often get: “Just relax!” or “Chill out!”
    And I’m like: I’m afraid it doesn’t work like that, my friend. I really wish it did, though!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I know, right? Of course we wish these simple remedies worked, and of course we’ve tried them all! I’ve heard those, too. Very frustrating! Thanks for sharing your experiences! 🙂

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  15. I can’t get enough of your writing, and I’ll try not to put only oregano on my leg if it’s ever injured, but possibly olive oil AND oregano, like I would on my pizza because it smells so good and maybe a little aromatherapy is all I need.

    Well, there’s a lot I could probably add, but one moment comes to mind: I felt nervous, but good that I finally had the courage to open up to a friend about having bipolar disorder. We were just becoming more close, so I figured I’d feel better letting her in on it. She said, “So, I guess me and (her husband) should lock up the gun cabinet before we leave.” (I was going to be house and pet sitting for them for a few days). I was flabbergasted (I love that word), and didn’t know how to respond. I told her that I wasn’t feeling suicidal and was, at the time, quite stable. She said, “Oh, I didn’t mean that you’d do anything to *yourself”.”

    This lady is a compassionate person, in general, so it seemed to be that she felt the need to say something, didn’t know what to say, so thought she’d be “cute” or “funny”. I didn’t say much right away, but eventually let her know that it was not OK to make jokes like that.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Love- I totally relate to this! That is such a bizarre response and id be flabbergasted, too (that IS such a great word- I should use it more! Lol) It’s just being so off about what mental illness is- I had one similar reaction to that from a friend and it stands out as the worst reaction in my mind- and sometimes comes up and used to make me feel shame/ now I need to be like, “whatever that was so lame!!” Omg you cracked me up with your pizza leg!!! So happy we have connected on here! Muah!

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  16. As a medical student, this really resonated with me. Interestingly enough, the area of specialty I’ve become very interested in is mental health, and reading this article was definitely an eye opener. One that should be read by any new doctor. Thanks for sharing, and thanks for following my small writing blog 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thanks so much! Very happy to follow your blog! 🙂 congrats on being in medical school! That’s awesome!! My psychiatrist that finally worked out really changed my life— because of how much I could tell she cared- and because she was so knowledgeable and didn’t rush– I do wish doctors had more time with patients. Hopefully this will change in future! 🙂 thanks again!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Yep the lack of time with patients definitely does affect how well doctors can really treat them, a lot of the time is spent trying to get to the root of the problem as quickly as possible, ignoring everything else. Sometimes those other things are just as important. Glad you’ve had luck with him/her!

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  17. This is what I hear on the everyday basis from my family. What irritates me the most is when they asked me to stop taking my medication -.- I can’t even sleep without taking it, what they want me to do? Not sleep for the entire month!

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      1. I am seeking professional help for my illness and I have been getting better. But some days it does get tough but I know that I can make it through. Thanks for the kind words 🙂

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  18. Love this!!! All too familiar.

    “The insurance companies are evil and put everyone on mind numbing drugs!”

    You: I don’t feel numb. I feel OK for once- like I can get out of bed and make eggs.”

    ^^SERIOUSLY. I definitely don’t feel numb, I still cry, still feel happiness at times, but most of all I simply feel NORMAL for a change.

    awesome blog, can’t wait to read more!

    Liked by 1 person

  19. Reblogged this on Dearest Someone, and commented:
    This is a brilliant read! Though it may be from the other side of the world (USA) it is still pretty accurate! Though mental health services in the UK are different, the stigma from others is certainly still there. Moreover, the stigma present in media (even on the other side of the world) affects the portrayal and perception of mental illness universally.

    This is a must read 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  20. “Stop being dramatic!”. My parents started that when I was like 7. A bipolar diagnosis was no surprise. This is a good piece. I wrote something called “Roll Over Bipolar”. Bipolar disorder is like herpes or something. You can’t tell anyone. So you have to hide it.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hey there! Wow- I’m definitely going to read that— mental illnesses are so stigmatized- yes- I’m so glad you are being so brave and sharing yourself and helping others as you do so! You go girl! 🙂

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  21. Ha ha! You had me laughing out loud :). I could relate to many of these things said. I have encountered so many ignorant people in my journey with anxiety and depression. Mostly I feel like punching them on the nose, but thesedays I am learning to roll my eyes (inwardly!) and move on. My own parents (mum in particular) have been known to tell me to “focus on the positives” whilst at the time, providing little support as my world turned to pieces. I noted that my weaning off the medication helped them to start relating to me better. Even after seeing the huge improvement in health, sleep and functioning. Some people need to remember their own struggles and how bad they were. My parents recently bought me a car which I couldn’t afford, so I’m putting a lot of it behind me in gratitude. Doesn’t stop my memory of the ignorance though.

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    1. It’s so hard right? Girl- I just smile and nod and tune them out now! Sometimes I defend mental illness and medication but sometimes I just don’t pick that battle because it’s so upsetting. I think it’s so scary for family to watch someone they love suffer so much that sometimes as a defensive mechanism they deny it/ maybe there need to be more educational programs for family– there just needs to be so much more awareness in general 😁😁😁 so glad we connected and thanks for sharing your personal experience. I will def read those blogs!

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      1. I think you are right about family being in denial. Especially when there is a big focus on “What you have achieved” in life.It is refreshing to connect with you and read your blog- I find a lot of comfort in your writing.

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      2. Thanks so much, Merryn! I think people can feel like it’s their fault if we have a rough patch- or it’s just too painful for them to admit that someone they love is in pain- but it’s NO ONES fault- it’s chemistry – an illness- and the hardest thing for us is when it’s ignored and denied. I think an amazing achievement in life is getting through an illness! But i know what you mean- I live in NYC and people often judge you on what you’ve accomplished. I don’t care how many degrees people have or how famous they are- it doesn’t change their value, you know? If they are doing awesome things for others or important causes I’m impressed 🙂 when I say I’m writing a musical about mental illness half the people are interested and want to know more and half the people run for the hills! Lol in our culture we don’t know how to talk about these illnesses without feeling shame and fear. The most of us that come forward the better that will be, though! I’m so glad we’ve connected! 🙂

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      3. I waited till I got on the pc to reply to this (I often just use my phone). Wow – thanks for all your feedback and comments. I LOVE writing to people :). I wish more people understood the brain chemistry thing – it’s so exhausting trying to explain it. It’s also hard to explain why sometimes things like CBT work and other times they don’t. I totally agree – degreeds and fame don’t matter at all. It’s the heart of a person that counts. I love that – a musical about mental illness! Let me know if any of it is put online in U-tube clips :). I’m really glad we’ve connected too. Already, my slump from the weekend has gotten heaps better and I’m back on track. I am greatly encouraged by the correspondence with others such as yourself. So thankyou! 🙂

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  22. I’ve faced lots of people telling me these things then thinking they were a great help to me. My mom has also told me that it’s probably a trend to be depressed so she thinks I’ll get over it quickly. When I first told her, she also told me things like, oh is it because of the book you’re reading? (I was reading The Bell Jar for school) But I don’t think she realizes how far back it goes and how the book actually helped me to some extent, at least to realize other people are going through the same thing. Anyways, I’m glad you found the right medication and you’re doing well. 🙂

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    1. Aw! I hope you are getting the help you need and seeing a therapist? Or a school counselor to work through the depression? My heart goes out to you! I remember when mine first started in high school.. I was really confused about why I felt bad, anxious and had this sadness that would lift no matter what. It can be very lonely and scary! Hang in there, hun! It gets better!

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      1. I’ve started seeing a therapist however I have yet to see progress. Thank you! Also, your blog gives me hope that I can get over it one day, so thanks for blogging.

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  23. Though I do not have a mental illness (I am however very interested in researching them), I did have explain to someone that OCD did not stand for Obsessive Cleaning Disorder…
    Really?!
    Also the amount of times I hear of people confusing Schizophrenia for DID is terrible.

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